So for the last week maybe I have felt pretty good. I feel like I am happier, I want to do more stuff, I am hopeful. It really is a good feeling. I know the sadness will creep back in in a couple weeks, around my birthday. But for now I am enjoying the sunshine that is my happiness. I find great joy in knowing that I got to hold Sydney for 9 months, I felt her kicks, and I heard her heartbeat. So listened to my heartbeat for 9 months. She knew that we love her more than anything. But I am glad that I was the one that got to carry her for the brief moment she was here. I listen to my "Sydney music" in the car all the time and every time I listen to these songs each one speaks to me. And each one has a different meaning, even though to "normal" people they all are about the same thing. Here are some of my favorite songs.
There are so many more, I will post later.
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