I knew this day was going to come. I thought I was going to be ok. But the closer he time came the more anxious I would get. Now that it is here I feel sick to my stomach and all I want to do is cry. I want to be happy for them but it is hard to see them get what I may never get to have. I hope everything goes smoothly and their bundle comes into this world screaming and healthy. But I just can't handle the happiness from anyone right now.
Everyday at work I am reminded how crappy my situation is. It is becoming very hard to see all these innocently happy pregnant women every time I go to work. Knowing that I will never have that innocents again. I really hope to have the happiness again but that innocents is gone.
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